mmmm in need of sleep. needing to read more socrates. so much plato. also, cleaning, rearanging and not being irritated by the suitemates. i miss my roommate. i mean, i love this roommate, but i miss MY roommate. i was planning on going to a concert on wednesday. instead, i "did homework" without actually doing much homework.

i had a russian test today. the first girl gets done in about 25 minutes. at 50 minutes, one guy and i are left. he decides to be done. I'm still staring at the page: do 8 of 12. i have three done, i know one is wrong. i stare at it for another ten minutes outside of the prof's office. attepmt to turn it in then. she goes over the page with me a bit and lets me take it back. i stare/work on it for another ten minutes maybe. Six are done, pretty sure two are wrong. turn it in like that. so bad. so bad.

i really need to learn how to suck it up because this constant desire to cry really sucks. it's not right. i'm stronger than that. i can handle myself better than that. i don't need special favors by tears. give me favors because i can plead my case or because you like me, not because you pity my tears.

i don't know what i'm saying except i have stress. Evan tries to tell me to do fun stuff, but i just can't seem to because, even though i do procrastinate, i really just can't sit back and enjoy it because i know i should be doing russian. or algebra. or calculus or reading fucking Plato. so it goes.