I'm falling in love with Kendall Payne, Sarah Masen and The Elms all at once.

zach

So, I have this friend and I really want to change the "status of our relationship" meaning I want to drop him but I don't know how. I've known him for about three years or so, but we only see each other about three times a year and then he refuses to talk. and it's retarded because most of the "talking" we do is online, when he has no talking skills. here is a typical conversation:
Z: Hi dana!
d: hi zach*
Z: How are you?
d: fine.
(five minutes pass)
Z: I'm good.
Z: What are you doing?
d: good.
d: I'm blogging.
(ten minutes pass)
Z: I can't think of anything to say.
Z: I hate that I can't ever talk to you.
d: i'm sorry.
(at least five more minutes)
Z: well, i'm going to go because i don't have any thing else to say and i know that bothers you.
d: Okay, bye zach.
*zach goes away*


Okay, maybe i'm being a bitch because I'm not helping him out, but seriously. When the conversation level stays this way for the entire time you've known someone, something isn't right.

any suggestions for saying "I don't even want to be friends"

*name changed, kinda

no.

I have a problem with this statement: MIDI files are very small, and therefore excellent for use in Web pages and other applications. Just a few seconds of download time, even on a slow connection, can yield several minutes of listening pleasure. now, maybe if you replace pleasure with torture then, maybe.

(i'm still slacking)

i hate politics

i just think this is so true.

I love you.

Я тебя люблю.

firebird

For some reason, bold doesn't seem to work well in Mozilla. I'm sure you're all thrilled to hear that.

soon, i want to update about this semester, but for now all i have to say is, one more speech to give, tomorrow, yeah!

GRIM!

So, Hillary & I are planning on living in Grim next semester and today at lunch I met a girl who is going to live in Grim as well. We're going to be on the same floor, she's a Math/German double major, I'm Math/PHRE. Her roommate is an English/Spanish double major and Hillary is too. It's just too weird. But pretty awesome as well.

KME survey

Major Mathematics and Philosophy/Religion

Minors (none)

Class Level How do you want to count? I'm claiming Sophomore for the rest of the semester.

Math Courses Calc, Discrete, Intermediate Analysis, Linear Algebra, Stat 290, Topology

Would you be willing to tutor other students? If so, what classes? Through calculus II

What has been your favorite math course? Intermediate Analysis

Favorite professor quote "I'm going to make you think like physicists, but don't worry, I'm not going to induct you into some kind of 'physicist cult' or anything. I'm not going to make you eat rice." (non-math)

Hometown Marionville, MO

What high school did you graduate from? Marionville High School, AS from Northwest Missouri State University through the Missouri Academy of Science, Mathematics, and Computing

What are your plans after graduation? ("I don't know" is a sufficient answer):

I plan to have been accepted to graduate school, defer for two years to Teach for America and then go back to school for some sort of advanced degree. After that, I will teach at a small liberal arts college in a large town. I also plan on "obtaining" a white chem lab jacket and a golf cart. I will wear the jacket while driving the cart and offering students rides. They will be lured in by my niceness and sensible drving, but when they get in I will strap on a helmet and drive fast, nearly running into people, trees and aiming for squirrels. I will drop them off on the wrong side of campus, for example: if they want to go to McClain, I will take them to Stokes staduim. I will then ride off cackling.

Or I won't finish school and I'll run away to Oregon, where I will make my living by singing Bob Marley songs in karaoke bars and selling knitted knickknacks of Ras Tafari. Having reached my personal promised land, I will grow discontent because it is far from perfect. Over the years, I will gain a massive following, I will convince this following that the Canadians are spying on us and that they are planning on passing over Washington to directly invade our beautiful state of Oregon. There will be a titanic uprising. This uprising will scare off the Cadandias and we will go back to our laid back lifestyle, realizing that Oregon is indeed as perfect as earth can get. Hm, come to think of it, I could actually do the golf cart thing in Oregon as well...

I mean, "I don't know."

That wasn't too over the top, was it?

tubular

I've said it before, and I'll say it again: I live in a giant tube.

(image removed because it drove me batty)

Paul hates me, but I continue to love him: Three times yesterday (and once today) the screen went blank and I couldn't just press "power" to turn it on, but had to unplug it and take the battery out and then replugging/inserting and then hitting power. I guess it's just like freezing, but scarier, and then not, because Paul usually freezes when he's doing too much and these times he hasn't been doing anything stressful. I'm worried.

I <3 Laundry Day.

You fall to your knees
You beg, you plead
Can I be somebody else
For all the times I hate myself?
Your failures devour your heart
In every hour, you’re drowning
In your imperfection.
~skillet Imperfection

My computer is sick. It randomly shuts off occasionally. I installed McAfee and it can't connect to something it needs to connect to and it's sad. IE won't work. I'm in Mozilla now. Be well, Paul. Be well.

I'm a beaver: motivated by being right

Sweet William, I have a gmail account.

Also, I'm screwed. I have way too much work to do by tomorrow.

animals

So today there was a social for BNB to find out what animal you are. Apparently I am a Beaver. 6. Limitations Overly critical and demanding of both themselves and others because of high standards; they rarely vocalize their criticisms. Yeah, I can see that. However, Hillary & I were brainstorming animals and personalities and we came up with:

penguin: cold and unable to fly
Platypus: you can't define me, you can't place me into one of your predetermined subgroups.

It wasn't a LONG brainstorming session, nor did we have writing instruments. Back off.

put me out of my misery.

I just want to curl up in a ball and cry. So many things... I'm lonely. I'm not happy at Truman, and I keep thinking that next semester will be better but I get scared thinking about what happens if it's not. What happens if I continue to be this unmotivated? I can't stay like this, I wonder about what life would be like if I hadn't left real high school. I wonder about quality of life now. And quite frankly, I'm not in a high quality right now. And I wonder if I'm depressed. And then I convince myself I'm not, but I'm not sure.

whatever

music

So, last night's Guster concert really made me want to see Blue October and Skillet in concert. I've loved Skillet since my pre-Academy days. Today, I ended up buying the new Skillet cd, Collide and I decided to check out their website. But first I went by Blue October's site to see if they were coming by my way anytime soon. I really didn't think they would, but they are! May 13, May 14 in St. Louis and KC, respectively. That's right after finals. It would be the perfect way to relax. Perfect. Also, Skillet's going mainstream. (now say that last sentence nearly hyperventalating with enthusiasm and fear.) It also makes me really happy that Skillet's linking to relevant magazine

Everything's gonna crash and break, gonna be your savior.

link dump

I need to dispose of some links. I've been building them up for a while. This past week I haven't done any work and that's given me quite a bit of spare time to accumulate worthless links.

Subservient Chicken This site was created by Burger King crazy weird, man. Crazy weird. Tell the chicken what to do. Hm... bk. beak? haha, It's late and my russian professor always says "it's the consonants that give the word the meaning, not the vowels" whatever.

drive thru records roommate amelia gave me this site, I downloaded the hellogoodbye album. I haven't listened to it yet.

emo art This link was written on some random peice of paper tacked onto a bulletin board, so Sandy went there, and I thought a few of the cartoons were funny, however I find that there really isn't that much and it's not as funny the second time around.

fifty word fiction I know I took this from a blog, but I couldn't for the life of me tell you who it was. I'm pretty sure it was someone I found on the recently updated blogs list. or from somewhere else. Anyway, apparently the only way I like to read is online reading, but I really do enjoy that. Enjoy these short stories.

RED MEAT It's a comic, a comic that is good at offending. So, take it with that warning. I'm going to have to add this to my check regularly list, because I do think it's funny.

Songs To Wear Pants To OH.MY.GOD. I <3 this site. Very funny, short songs. Pretty new, I'm hopeful it stays around and good.

The Writing On the Stall A website of a janitor and the grafitti he encounters on bathroom stalls. Also, submissions from readers. Much of it is high quality.

Engrish.com This is the classic Engrish site. Where people submit photos of signs they see in other countries, in battered English.

If I don't give a site or person, it's because I truely don't remember where I got the link, some come from way back in my brain, and others... well I haven't actually done any work in the past week, I'm blaming brain rot and all that jazz.

post-Guster Concert

So Guster totally gave a great concert tonight. Afterwards, my feet and back hurt (y menya bolyat nogi i spina) but I wanted to run down to the basement and get Reese's cups from the vending machine and ice from the ice machine. --You don't want to wait for the ice to melt though, because the machine is in the laundry room, so the water tastes like laundry-- I grab my cup and $0.55 and head down. When I got to first floor, I remembered that they were selling cookies, and I thought that if they had anything good, I just might get that. I'm all for supporting the little people, or something. But I wasn't impressed so I went down to the basement and realized that Reese's are $0.60 not $0.55, because Dr. Pepper is obviously $0.55. So I ended up getting cookies from whatever organization was selling it, because there was no way I was going to make another trip for a nickle. Then when I got upstairs I realized I hadn't picked up my ice. What a night!

American Social Hygiene Posters

Back in the day, I remember Mark posting a link to American Social Hygiene Posters and recently I rediscovered them. I adore these posters, and I'm not really sure why. I noticed that today he put a link up to WWII posters. While that's a good collection, I'm partial to the University of Minnesota Twin City's collection Call me baised. I've used some from both the social hygiene collection and the WWII collection as door decs. Men who know say no to prostitutes spreaders of syphilis and gonorrhea

Thursday

Both of my classes were cancelled for today. And I swore I would work, but no. I didn't work at all. I spent some good time with friends. I ate some good food, too. Angie makes killer grilled cheese sandwiches.

I also talked to my friend Kelbe who said that she found a sponsor for a knitting club at her university. That's so cool, I wish we had a knitting club. I wonder if there would be enough interest to start one.

Oregon info

I spent quite a bit of time online today, with some really funny sites. Today I came across this Six Things You Don't Know About Oregon. Sounds appropriate, no?

(the important roommate)

I have two roommates. One never gets any calls and is always in the room while the other one always gets calls and is never in the room. Invariably they ask when she's going to be back, but truth be told, I have no clue, nor do I care to find out. One of my current projects is to get some voice inflection that sounds like I care and like I am not pissed off that they are asking. It is failing miserably because I don't care and I am pissed off that they are asking. Case in point: phone call five seconds ago. However, what really gets me is when she calls and asks if anyone has called for her. Dude, I know you're important and you have important activities, an hour or two or three isn't going to kill anyone from the school newspaper or your Bible study group. I should take the advice from the other roommate, don't answer the phone.

Oregon Dreams

It started last semester (I'm in college). I had a sudden desire to just run away, to escape from the university life and enter some type of "real world" as opposed to the psuedo-worlds I've been living in recently. For reasons I can't explain, Oregon became my "promised land" In my mind Oregon is the epitome of good, while I live here, in "Babylon". I've never actually been to Oregon, and it is an idealized place, no question. I have no idea life there is like, but I hold on to the hope that it is better than here, if only because anything has to be better than here.